nerd and dum

Once upon a time there was a man named nerd and he was a bit of a retard but he had a crush on someone her name was don.nerd and don were totally different nerd was a nerd and don was a popular person but theres a chance anyway back to the story about nerd.

Nerd meet a guy named dum and guess what dum is not good at anything except for rugby so they ended up being friends and dum did all of nerds sports stuff and nerd did dums exams and stuff it worked out perfectly intill.

Nerd was going to america with his rugby team and dum had a spelling bee and nerd was really bad at rugby and dum I cant explain how bad he is at spelling well actually ask him to spell anything he will get it wrong gurantee.

When they got to nerds house nerd started helping dum with his spelling he asked him to spell a and guess what he spelt it z then he asked how do you spell z he said a. 

When they got to school guess who was there fatso and guess what fatso weighed yup you got it 1 ton is that even normal for a 8 year old but he was really good at rugby cause he would just run over people and also he was good at spelling because he would just fart and he'd win by being the only contestant did you know he won the spelling bees from when he was born 2006 and that was all by default and he was coming to the spelling bee to.

As dum enterd the stage his heart was pumping as the judges introduced him the judge said out on the right is duck duck goose and joining him is fatso and to the left is john jonstondon and right beside him is d....u.....m aren't you dum anyway lets start ok first word for dum is follow ok is it g.....o.....l and that is wrong now fatso you word is jam j.....a....m correcto now john your word is smell ok s....y....y is that right no its wrong and john went so crasy he burnt the building down but a few seconds later everybody was gone except dum and the judge so the judge said congratulations you won 

And the next day at school fatso came in saying I won the spelling bee then john came in and said no i won and then dum said no even the judge said I won sore losers then john said DONT SAY THAT and what did he do he burnt the building down.

The next day there was no school but those three were all there and they started having a fight and dum said i hate you fatso and john and john was like my name is rage i changed it so what did he do he burnt dum and thats the end of the story 

Jigsaw

On the weekend...

This previous weekend my family went down to Taupo to see my Grandparents. When we got there my mum and I went out to play tennis. This was very enjoyable because the wind wasn't blowing so it was easy to hit the ball. It was also so much fun because we usually have to play on the driveway at home so it was much better to play on a proper court.

 Later in the evening we went out to dinner. We went to the Mid-Christmas buffet at the hotel. My favourite food there was the mini hotdogs and the ice cream. We then headed out to watch the All Blacks. It was a very tight game and everybody (even the English) was nervous.

The next day Nan and I went out and did some golf putting. I somehow beat her (maybe it was because she gave me an extra shot!) My Mum and I played some more tennis and this time Dad joined in. It ended with me hitting a high shot out of the court and over the fence! We then went out and played some mini golf. I wasn't playing nearly as well as when Nan and I were playing. But I eventually found my shape and got on the leaderboard for the top boy (only because nobody else was there!)

 After that we went out to try to get a hole in one in the pontoon. Everybody reckoned my shot was good (it was fantastic compared to some of the women doing it. One of them hit the sand!) Next we went out to lunch at Robert Harris. I got bored since all they were talking about was politics! Finally it was time to go. We said our goodbye's and we headed back up to Auckland.

This was a trip to remember because I had so much fun. 

By Luke Stanton

Pirate Us 2

Piarate Us 2 (a parody of zombieland)

It's a zombie apocalypse! Ahhhhhhhh!!!! Ok I bet your wondering how this zombie apocalypse started so sit back it's a long story. 

y'know in pirate us one how the bad guys died from the volcano. Well that volcano contained flech from a golden tiger that once fell in the volcano. But if you mix soft golden tiger flesh with that volcano it makes zombie mixture. And since the bad guys touched lava from that volcano they became zombies. It also allows them to come up to graves and rise zombies from them. Thats enough you should know about the zombies. Wait almost forgot Jon, Harry and Ethan gave up being pirates so they changed their names to less pirate like names so they changed their names to Ethan-Jo Jo Jon-Felix and Harry kept his name for some strange reason.

Also Harry, Ethan, Felix, Banana and everybody else has been suviving for months Harry, Jo Jo  and Felix are lucky cause they all have shotguns.(Banana has a mini one)Now the story of them surviving.

 It was one night at about 12:00pm and they really needed to go toilet, but there's just one huge danger! Which is in the toilets, zombies hide in toilets ( not in the actual toilet, just in the bathroom and can attack people who go in there. Now back to the story. They were just about to open the door to the bathroom when, BOOM, the bathroom door crashed opened, and they got the fright of their lives... A running zombie! It chased them all around then another running zombie joined them! Then Felix had an great idea "how about we split up and I'll meet you guys at that car over there and we'll drive away. "Great idea" said Jo Jo and Harry. So they split up and about two minutes later they were all in the car (all in the front seat). And to warn you all, always check the back seat, zombies are smart enough to climb in your back seat and while your not in the car, and when'll get in... BOOM! they get you. 

So while they drove away a zombie popped up and gave them a massive fright. Then they crashed into a wall and they went unconscious but the zombie got them and they all turned into zombies and then the whole world did.( don't worry this is story world )Ha just kidding they wore seatbelts and the zombie flew out of the front window of the car. O zombie you really need to wear your seatbelt.( well he learnt a lesson) They thought it was dead. But the zombie crawled up to them but Harry shot it dead with his gun. Luckily they suvived but they had no food no water and no toilet.

 The next day they were walking around the airport where a lot of dead cars were, then they heard a noise, it was a car driving towards them, but not fastly. The car stopped, the car door opened, they pointed their guns, it was a man!(with a pretty cool ride) The man said "hop in" so they did.

"Huhhh, a toilet!" Said Harry.

 They all said "who are you"? "The names jake" jake replied. "Where are you taking us"? They said, "You'll see" jake said. So they waited, until they saw a truck on the side of the road, a candy truck, they thought "why did he take us to a candy truck"?" Why did you take us here"? Asked Jo Jo "These candys are my favourite food" said jake. Now on the count of three lets bash the door down. One two three! CRASH!

"OH damit!" Said Jake. "Why did you say that?" said Felix. "Because their flippin mini pies!" Shouted Jake, "well on the bright side at least we have food" said Harry. "And their warm too" said Jo Jo. "But I love those"said Jake.

 Then they drove to a supermarket. "Why did you take us here?" Said Harry. "The worlds not going to kill the zombies by its own, that's why we're going to kill all the zombies."said Jake.

So jake showed Harry, Banana, Jo Jo and Felix his weapons in the boot of the car. He showed them shears, chainsaw a machete and a mini sub machine gun. "you've got pretty cool weapons" said Jo Jo , "of course" said jake. So Jake gave them a weapon each, Harry got the chainsaw, Jo Jo got the machete, Felix got the shears and banana got the mini sub machine gun.

So they went inside and it was pretty empty until a zombie popped up from the corner of a shelf. And banana shot it. "Well that was fast", said Harry. 

Boom! Two zombies jumped out from the shelfs." I was wrong" said Harry  "JEEZ zombies you gave me a fright," said Felix. As he killed them with the shears, "ok these shears are awesome! Felix shouted. Then two zombies came around from the corner, "CHAINSAW TIME" screamed Harry. As he wasted the zombies with his chainsaw. "My turn" said Jo Jo as he chopped the heads of two zombies. There were no more zombies left in the supermarket. 

"YEAH!" everyone said.

 "We've almost killed all the zombies" said Jake, "how do you know"? said Harry. "On my how many zombies are alive tracker" said jake. "Ok" said Jo Jo. Then they hopped in the car and Jake said "the last destination..." said jake " is Disneyland" "by the way theme park zombies only come in the night not the day."

"So they all got machine guns with infinity ammo and went to a huge Ferris wheel. Then jake said, "first Check that if you shoot it once it goes and if you shoot it again it will stop" so they hopped inside, shot the machine when they got to the top and waited ten minutes then millions of zombies arrived in one

 "SHOOT" they all screamed. This was the biggest thing in there lives. The risk, the skill and the braveness. And so they just keep shooting, and shooting and shooting. And now well they shoot we shall have a song. ( to the tune of Get lucky)"And we've come to far to give up on this shoot. So let's raise our guns and our stuff to the stars. Dann dann, I'm up all night to shoot guns, Your up all night to shoot guns, We're up all night to shoot guns, There up all night to get bloody. I'm up all night to shoot guns, your up all night to shoot guns, were up all night to shoot guns, there up all night to get bloody, there up all night to get bloody, sometimes we get to launch zombies, with my tracker thingy, this zombies name is Timmy, and he's about to get bloody, he's about to get bloody, we've almost got victory, hey Harry shoot that last zombie.( robotic voice ) we've now got victory, so let's celebrate happily yeah. And let's start a party. And guys look the zombies are turning back to people again, that's great cause there's no more zombies, that's great cause there's no more zombies.❌1 (guitar)dewn ❌32 

 "WHOO HOO" screamed everyone as the zombies turned back to people again. Everyone was happy because now there were no more zombies. And this was the end of a ( I said a ) adventure. And when I ment a, I didn't mean all adventures! 

PIRATE US 3!

Coming soon!

Pirate us written by Harrison king 

My plan of the Leaning Tower of Pisa

WALT: to plan a report

I was researching about the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Here is my plan.

By Nathaniel

Once upon a time...

Once upon a time a slightly eye changing story in story land there were 3 very dumb witches who always got muddled up into which story they were from. The names of these witches were Candy Witch from Hansel and Gretel, The Wicked Witch of the West from the Wonderful Wizard of Oz and the Grand High Witch from the witches. One day the witches got so muddled up they just got muddled up. The Grand High Witch thought she was from Hansel and Gretel, The Wicked Witch of the West thought she was from The Witches and the Candy witch thought she was from the Wonderful wizard of Oz. The story land fairy said to them "If you can't remember which story you are from by tomorrow you will set a spell over the whole land and you will turn into la la loopsy lands slaves." The witches soon discussed a plan and set off to the library. When they got there they found out that the library was closed for repairs. So after hours of moaning and complaining to the builder they went to la la loopsy land. As they arrived they saw doll faces everywhere. They were just about to enter when a loud voice boomed over the loud speaker. "Halt! What do you think you're doing?" But before the witches could answer the guard questioned them. "What are you doing without button eyes?" "Umm, umm. Well we don't know." Said the witches. The guard who's name was Sergeant Buffalo Face (who's face looked like a buffalo) soon complained to the witches and told them that they would have to get buttons sewn in place of their eyes. The witches gasped and went off crying to their mummy (who's name was Maleficiant) who told them that they deserved to get buttons for eyes. The 3 witches were soon sent off to deliver a letter to Sergeant Buffalo Face. When they got there the Sergeant read the letter and took them off to jail. Here's what the letter said...

Dear Sergeant Buffalo Face,

Three witches called Candy Witch, The Wicked Witch of the West and The Grand High Witch need their eyes to be replaced with buttons.

Sincerely Maleficiant. 

The Sergeant sent for the queen stitcher and asked her to give the witches buttons for eyes. 673,478,832 hours later the witches were strapped down ready to have buttons for eyes. Bumblebee the queen stitcher started the complicated process of changing the witches eyes to buttons. Very soon the fairy of story land came along and told the witches that they are going to become la la loopsy lands slaves (because the witches were so dumb they still didn't know which story they were from). So 0.1 of a second later they were turned into la la loopsy lands slaves. 

THE END

By Charlotte.C

The long process of doing jobs for my dad:)

                     The long process of doing jobs for my dad  

One long hot summers day I went to work with my dad. In the big ute ready           to make some hay bales. My dad out spied while I'm sitting in the passengers seat waiting and waiting. He comes back drives a bit and … where in a paddock. 

Dad hops out again to click some joints into the tractor he transfers him and me into the tractor where ready to roll. Where going round in circles balling hay bales.

 about 10 minutes later it's time to pick up the bales and put them on the blue shining ute. He going around and around until … his ute can't fit I between the bales. He asks me to role over all the bales on the outside row I gaze up and the men at the. Top they were all drinking beer he said to me I'll give you $10 I said yes. As I push all the bales over dads following me. I'm in jeans I'm feeling really hot I take my jacket off and carry on. As I finish I jump in the car. 

We go and join the men at the top that are having a drink and I had a lemonade. Over all I learnt what it's like to have responsibilities I also found out what a hard job my dad has and I can understand his stress levels. 

By Paige 😜

AG day animals

Many people probably don't know that we can all now get our AG day animals. Isn't that exciting! Aren't you excited? Because I know I am, a lot! Tell me in a comment in what your planning on getting or hope to have for AG day. Well I know that I will defiantly be getting a lamb from my Uncle Dean in the Waikato. I will probably get one a little earlier because his daughters also known as my cousins Briar,Gemma and Erica have gone to collage.So they now have no AG day. Instead of getting one after all three of them. Now I can get one first because I'm the only one needing one this year. If I could Get a lamb of my choice it would have to be a little cute lamb with little brown spots in places all over it.

Good luck by Brooke Hamilton 

Motat Jigsaw